Reborn part II (In Confusion)

Dear me,

I found again what I wanted to see, but it seemed to be so far away beyond my reach. I wonder what will become of me. If I thought I was right then I’m wrong… There are many things that I want to know, but I can’t. Why can’t I? There are always something that keep preventing me.. and I still wonder what..

There will be a way, somehow, but when… Not Everybody can figure out, nor can I … Am I stucked here? Am I in the right time being here? Have I done good things or tried to do it?

Do I have to keep away my feeling and let things just happen the way they are?? I would say I am totally wrong.. If I  weren’t too picky, I would get some of them.. but then, Do they make sense to me? or Do I have to cheat just to get them? I want one, but this time it should be perfect.. Am I putting a too-high-standard? In the end, That’ll be useless cause I get nothing, completely nothing.

Perhaps I can just say.. I’m the one to be blamed for all things happening around me.. I feel that I’ve been a wrong guy in a wrong time and wrong place.. I am not supposed to help and all I do just playing around and doing nothing . At least I can say that I was lucky, but then Did I deserve these? Why don’t they change my luck and put on someoneelse? Probably It’ll be better…

I wanna know the answer soon

 

I

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