Impresssion of Butoh

Butoh is Hallographic

Sad but happy

confusing but relieving

deep but shallow

Every option is a priority

none of it less important than the other

It is sick in a way that it is healthy

Butoh is horrifying

Dying but surviving

Killing but caring

Gambling but precising

Avoiding but approaching



4 a.m

It’s almost 4 a.m and I’m still trying to figure out what to do with this page.

Reconditioning situation when your brain is wired to world of creativity, detached from reality into some kind of mystical absurd realm where words are hitting you anywhere you want without great effort, is tough. I saw some TED Talks about creative process, but still couldn’t apply to myself. For instance, I used to make poetry almost every single days (Yeah, long ago) and I kinda wished that my shakespeare brain was active all the time. However it did not come out as I expected. I just had to accept the fact that “owright.. that realm is an open-and-closed private facility and now it’s temporarily closed”. I miss those old days. Perhaps now I am not as crazy as I was few years ago.

5 years have passed and I understand one thing : I’m still poetry kind of gal. I write poems better than script (or this is just my excuse). It occured to me that I’m not very good at writing long narrative sentences. I like straightforward words, which are –yeay short– and honest. I really want to write 200 pages novel one day,which I think requires practice, but I don’t like to finish a story. Weird, huh? That’s why I love absurd things.

However I can always finish a poem. Somehow, creating an end in a poem is less painful for me that it is for a novel. I’m not sure how shakespeare did that, but he wrote a play containing series of poems from top to bottom. Not everybody can enjoy it. It didn’t ring a bell in my head how he did it. I was always thinking, he did enter another realm and brought back everywords possible then scratched them in paper. I imitated for few years. Then here I am, back in unproductive state.


Far than contented,  it must grow
Unnoticeably fast. Wild. Nobody cares. No purpose whatsoever. Only being distraction, of what? Those who was left unspoken,  probably the wind or the air or just change of decades. They care not,  they fear not. He did send some tasks, yet still unrevealed to thou. Those who was left unspoken,  unclear and undecided. What are you for?

Rock Opera-Hamlet

Rock Opera Hamlet!

Original Work                  : William Shakespeare

Adaptation/Direction : Fuji Daisuke

with reference to Kawai Shouichirou’s New translation – Hamlet (Kadokawa Shoten Publishing)

Composer/Music Arrangement : Aoki Tomoko, Teshima Kyoko

Cast  :

Hamlet (Prince of Denmark)     ………………    Ryuu Masaki

Claudius (Present King, Hamlet’s Uncle)   ………………    Koshino Ryuu

Ophelia (Hamlet’s love, Daughter of Polonius)    ……………….   Ranno Hana

Gertrude (Queen of Denmark, Hamlet’s mother)  ……………….   Itsumine Aki

The Ghost  (Hamlet’s late father, King of Denmark) …………..  Ken Ruisu

Polonius ( Claudius’s chief counselor, Ophelia and Laertes’ father)  ……………   Ayazuki Seri

Rosencratz (Hamlet’s friend)  …………..  Toka Yurino

Guildenstern (Hamlet’s friend)  ……………..  Hozuki An

Laertes ( Son of Polonius, Ophelia’s brother) …………….   Tamaki Ryou

Horatio (Hamlet’s close friend, confidante) ……………   Uzuki Hayate

Celia (Horatio’s sister) …………..  Hanahi Mira


“Expect the unexpected” is the proper word to describe this rock-opera. Be it Takarazuka or Shakespeare, indeed this musical is very entertaining. I love Shakespeare’s works although my poor (victorian) english ability makes it difficult to understand the whole play. But Stage being stage itself, there were so many things that could express the play. This rock-musical was staged in Japanese, with more-modern translation from the original Hamlet. What I highly appreciated from Takarazuka-adaptation is the music (which I think is Takarazuka’s original composition) and the modern setting, without parting too much from Shakespeare’s beautifully phrased lines. Usually Takarazuka chose to make their own script with title “inspired by”, but this time it was almost all verbatim based on Kawai Shouichiro’s new translation of Hamlet (with a bit of cuts here and there).

I am not going to tell everything, because that will make you seem less interested on seeing the whole play. There are just some hints I will review.

First, you want to praise really high for Ryuu Masaki. She is absolutely the star. Clearly someone who is the main actor has to seal the spotlight, but she is better than that. Her rock-y voice is strong, a little bit of vibration and stable. 70% of the script were sung in this musical, and she sang most of it. Despite the fact that it is last day (I got recording from Senshuraku) her voice didn’t show sign of wearing- off. Other than voice, she could convey her Hamlet remarkably well. Despair, Anger, Confusion, Complexity, Joy, Love and feeling of betrayal. I felt that I was there beside Hamlet, not knowing what to do, feeling depressed that there was nothing I can do to make things better other than stay silent.

Second, I can’t describe detail for the rest of the cast BUT they were fantastic. My eyes set on Uzuki Hayate (Horatio). I wasn’t sure whether Horatio supposed to be that eye-catching, but Yeah this horatio is so lovable that I waited every next scene with excitement. I wanted to hear and see more of him. Horatio was Hamlet’s confidante. She portrayed it as a man whom you can put trust on and can be brake for Hamlet’s unstoppable impulsive mind. I am looking forward to see Uzuki Hayate performance in other play.

Third, I found that collaboration of serious (rather classic) dialogue, simple props, gothic nuance and rock music were divine. I gave 4 thumbs up to stage director, wardrobe, music director, producer and everyone behind the stage. They did absolutely gorgeous work.

To be or Not to be, that’s the choice.

Hamlet has chosen to be.

Dear Earth, I summoned you

Wind is cracking my cells, I can feel it

Too much agony overflowing and

this pain is excruciatin, I can feel it


Ground is shaking my soul, I can feel it

Too much hatred rendering

This pain is excruciating, I can feel it


Dear earth,

unleash all agony and betrayal you felt.

I summoned you to rise and be alive


Unchain all hatred and pain you felt

I summoned you to talk

to human who believe.

Illusion of Dead Rabbit

Talking about Hell, Someone whispered to me

The ghost of my pet made a fool out

of me. Someone was talking about Hell

Why Heaven was so far beyond my reach

Someone whispered to me. The ghost of my

rabbit cried bitterly. I could not be deceived

This is illusion, or so what it seemed.

I’ve been electrocuted and paralyzed

Someone was still talking about Hell

I want to not give a crap, but my

dead rabbit came. I hate reality

May God bestowed me power to re-create

illusion of reality, then my rabbit will

come to live. Then someone whispered to

me, still talking about Hell

After Rain

After the rain, I saw you walking away from me

I saw you shrugging, holding your tears

I saw everyone were embracing you, encouraging you

I knew I wasn’t gone in vain

After the rain, I saw you playing

sometimes you stopped for a moment as if

you were missing someone.

I knew you felt some emptiness in your heart

I can feel it

After the rain, I saw you grow

stronger, tougher, brighter

you are reaching your school year

you are learning fast

you are getting better at everything

you are always smiling

you are happy

After that heavy rain, I am still here

taking form of anything just to be with you

I do want to grow with you

Dear Azka, after the rain

I see you. Always


In memoir of  my late friend, a great colleague and devoted mother